In a high voltage drama before parliament’s winter session today morning, Aam Aadmi Party Supremo Arvind Kejriwal launched ASS Bank (AAP Samosa Savings Bank) that will help common man tackle the currency crisis that India is currently facing due to sudden demonetization drive taken up by Narendra Modi government. AAS Bank has offered to exchange old 500s and 1000s rupees notes with Samosas that were specially prepared for Aam Aadmi Party meetings.
Starting tomorrow, massive crowd of AAP fans (commonly known as AAPTards) is expected outside Arvind Kejriwal’s ASS (AAP Samosa Savings Bank) awaiting their share of Samosa in exchange of 500s and 1000s rupees currency
“We are, and have always been against black money. But we can not stand the harassment that is caused to common men & women.” Said Kejriwal while addressing media conference. “Aam Aadmi Party has never stashed any money – black or white – as whenever we receive any kind of funds, we immediately buy samosas and stock them in Delhi Chief Minister’s office. In fact, we have so many samsosas now that we can actually use them to replace existing currency. Modi talks about Digital India and wants bitcoin to replace black money. But samosa has far more potential as it wont just be limited to government’s digital locker but will serve as something that aam aadmi can hold in hand and if needed – can eat. Bitcoin, black money… Sabse bada scam toh wahi hai! sab mile hue hai ji. Samosa hi hai jo political revolution laayega. Desh jaldi badlega!”
This announcement has brought a cheer on faces of AAP fans who have been standing in queues outside bank and ATM with a disgruntled face. Starting tomorrow, massive crowd of AAP fans (commonly known as AAPTards) is expected outside Arvind Kejriwal’s ASS (ASS Bank) awaiting their share of Samosa in exchange of 500s and 1000s rupees currency that Modi government has recently banned and practically rendering all stashed black money worthless.
While BJP has not shown much of an enthusiasm over this recent development, West Bengal Chief Minister Mamata Benerjee has extended a lending to Aam Aadmi Party in form of Green Chutney as it may bring lot of Kripa as mentioned by Nirmal Baba.
“Statue of black money is only a way to make everyone understand that we acknowledge the gravity of scams.” – said Rahul Gandhi while announcing multiple statues of black money to symbolize scams that were were uncovered by CAG during last five years period. “Larger the amount of black money involved, taller the statue will be to represent that scam.” – added Rahul Gandhi after sharing a rough sketch of statues to be erected in front of Swiss bank in Switzerland.
As informed by UPA government, larger the amount of black money involved in scam, taller the statue will be that will represent the scam.
“Black money is in our shirts. It’s in our pants. Scams is only a state of mind. Hence, we decided to give it a physical form.” – Continued Rahul Gandhi.
“We will soon be launching a drive to collect black money from those who are involved in scams. We will exchange the black money for coins of Indian rupee. These coins will be used in statues that will represent scams.” Explained Manish Tewari while addressing the press conference held in Congress head quarters at 10, Janpath.
Digvijay Singh clarified to media that – “This has nothing to do with a community or religion. Unlike Modi government’s project of building tallest statue of Sardar Patel – Statue of Unity, our plan is not limiting the subject to a specific party. Every party has a right to execute scam and make black money. We are not limiting it to a particular religion or community. What can be more uniting than this?”
“The statue of black money to represent scams is same as my open challenge to everyone for a debate. Nothing can stand against it. I challenge everyone to prove that how Modi’s plan of world’s tallest statue is superior than UPA government’s plan of statue of black money?” – Kapil Sibal challenged the media to provide an answer.
“We will soon be launching an official body to manage scams and black money. Once Soniaji appoints, I’ll make a formal announcement to declare scam minster who will direct the project of statue of black money.” – Reported Manmohan Singh despite media showed no interest in having his comment.